Domestic Disillusionment

“Hi honey.”

“Sharon? What’s up? You’ve never called me at work before. Did someone die? Are the kids OK?”

“I’m really sorry.”

“It’s OK, it just makes me think something’s wrong.”

“Oh, no, no. Nothing to worry about. I got a proxy.”

“A proxy? For what?”

“Well, you know, this marriage thing? 24/7? Sickness, health, and everything? Dirty socks, farts, grumbles, bad moods, the flu, all of it? It’s not what I thought it would be.”

“Can we talk about this at home? This isn’t the kind of conversation I want to have from my cubicle with 500 million people listening in.”

“There’s really nothing to talk about. I just wanted to tell you that I hired a proxy for a few weeks. Tabitha. She’s always liked you, and she’s happy to take on the job.  I need to get away.”

“Here’s the deal, sweet cheeks. You cannot hire a proxy wife. You can’t just leave me like that because you’re sick of marriage. This is serious and we need to talk about it, but not now. I’m at work, for the love of god. Sharon? Sharon?”

8 thoughts on “Domestic Disillusionment

  1. Oh, so funny!! By the last sentence, I was laughing aloud at the husband’s frustration and Sharon’s abrupt departure. No need to talk anymore, the poor sap just sealed Sharon’s deal. Too funny.

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