“Hey Lamont. I think we should do more entertaining, you know?”
“I can see entertaining some ideas. Is that what you have in mind?”
“Your puns are not entertaining.”
“Yeah, they are. Anyway, where did this idea come from?”
“Did you see the girls who moved in next door? Just last weekend? HOTTIES.”
“You’re just determined to do that, aren’t you, the old ‘biological imperative.’ You know where it ends.”
“Yeah, but in the meantime it’s a lot of fun.”
“Uh, no it isn’t.”
“Whatever. I’ve invited them over for a barbecue later. I’ve told them all about you.”
“They haven’t lived here long enough for you to manage that.”
“Just one thing, Lamont. Don’t go talking about the old days, any of them. It really freaks women out when you start lamenting your lost life as an oak tree or reminiscing about the glory days of being a T Rex.
“I liked being an oak tree and it was glorious being a T Rex. You can’t deny it.”
“I wasn’t a T Rex, Lamont, if you recall. You ate me in that iteration. It’s NOT my favorite. Besides, a lot of people don’t get it. They don’t remember. So what do you say? Carne Asada? Burgers and hotdogs?”
“Maybe they’re vegetarians, Dude. You ought to find out.”
“Whoa. Then what?”
“We grill them.”
Lamont and Dude are characters I came up with a few years ago. They have the uncanny ability to remember many of their past incarnations which gives them a unique perspective on life, the universe and everything.
7 thoughts on “Dude and Lamont Plan a Barbecue”
are you still a vegan if you eat a vegan?
No. It’s one of the easier paradoxes to resolve. Cattle are vegetarians. 🙂
There are some things that are unforgettable it seems.
The whole vegan thing confuses me as there are so many different “vegans”. I eat meat, always have, always will. Now I hope the girls don’t show up, lol….and I was leaning toward a romantic dinner together, lol.
With barbecue sauce, I would hope?
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