“In writing, habit seems to be a much stronger force than either willpower or inspiration. Consequently there must be some little quality of fierceness until the habit pattern of a certain number of words is established. There is no possibility, in me at least, of saying, “I’ll do it if I feel like it.” One never feels like awaking day after day. In fact, given the smallest excuse, one will not work at all. The rest is nonsense. Perhaps there are people who can work that way, but I cannot. I must get my words down every day whether they are any good or not.” John Steinbeck
A friend yesterday commented in an email that — as far as my blog is concerned — I’m “pretty prolific.” It’s true. I have written an absurd number of blog posts in the six (??) years I’ve been doing this, and this is NOT the only blog. I began in 2009 with a blog on Blogger that I can still read if I want to but not you (ni-ner ni-ner). At the time I started that blog, I was digging out of a lot of bad stuff and I decided to write down one good memory every day. It was a good strategy for pulling myself out of that deep hole.
As I was writing my post yesterday about the horse I thought about my friend’s comment about my being prolific (as a writer, I guess that’s true) and why I’d written that post — and several others since this weirdness began. I also thought about what it means to write a blog and what I learned this past year from reading to actual real-life breathing people. I also thought about one of my longest-time friends — Ann — who called the other day and wanted to talk about Martin of Gfenn and whether writing a book about a leper had given me a perspective on what we’re dealing with now.
Of course my friend didn’t know what she was asking. That question naturally unleashed the whole quiet tirade on how leprosy was NOT a plague in medieval times, how that way of seeing it happened nearly 700 years later, how history is mythology and wishful thinking a lot of the time, and THEN a humor-laced (but really, who but me finds leprosy funny?) explication of what really happened back then. I’m telling you, that’s a tedious talk for anyone to listen to unless they’ve signed up for it. Fortunately, there’s also a video. 🙂
These are really weird times. My friend and I talked about that, too, how you go to the store and come home and wash everything you bring into your house. Most egregious, I think, for all of us, are the way it has impinged on the normal, every-day things we do mostly without thinking like pushing a cart through the supermarket, putting gas in our cars, hugging our friends when we meet, lunch dates, traveling. The extraordinary things — like volunteers making masks and scary statistics — we take those things in differently, with a kind of wonderment that can induce cathartic tears. When I told my friend of all the amazing things happening here in this remote, impoverished valley, she was truly moved. She responded with a dark story of how a company for which she is the general counsel (she’s an attorney) has had to lay off half its workers. That’s this moment in time. One blazingly beautiful story followed hard on by one of sadness and difficulty.
So my blog. I know what we’re all doing right now. We’re all getting through this thing that we don’t understand. Some of us might have good government, others of us don’t. In our connected world, we don’t only know what’s happening HERE but everywhere. The thing of “flattening the curve” REALLY means, “You’re all going to get sick, but we don’t want to overwhelm the hospitals, so this will space it out a little bit.”
So, my blog. The Big Empty is amazing and I live in it. I’ve always been grateful to the fates for bringing me here, but now I’m even more grateful. Where I live, there have been — in a place the size of Connecticut — only 20 confirmed cases. Of course, there are more who have it, but… 2 people have died. Since the odds of seeing other people in the Big Empty aren’t big, the chance of being too close to someone is also small. In an hour I’m heading to Alamosa to pick up groceries. I will be doing that in this same big valley. I don’t like it, the process is annoying, but, hopefully, when I’m done I’ll be set for two weeks.
I think often of my cousin’s son, with whom I’m friends, who lives in New York City. It’s a different thing completely for him. Streets that should be full of people are empty. Streets in my town are NEVER full of people. How it would be to have your world literally changed so dramatically in such a short time? In New York City, the a number of people equivalent to the entire population of Alamosa has died.
So, posts about the Big Empty? I write them so you can come with my dogs and me on solitary walks in one of the most beautiful places I know. My habit of writing? It’s my way of keeping things normal.
P.S. If you’re interested in the TRUTH about the medieval leper, I wrote a paper about it. I’ll post it in parts if enough people have sufficient curiosity. It’s pretty amazing…
28 thoughts on “Writing a Blog in These Times”
Thank you again for sharing your thoughts x
Your writing always resonates with me. I’m so curious all the time. In the last 4 days I’ve fasted~from media/computer/society in general~to relish on some truths I know through all of the uncertainty. I started this blog after writing my thoughts so many years in journals. And also, trying to dig out of holes like you mentioned in your life. To many, I’m a “baby” at just near 50. To others I’m “old as dirt.” But I’m in the middle of finding my true purpose for existence. And at this very second, it’s connecting with you and others through blogging (and my pup on my lap, watching True Grit, and sipping my Matcha Tea with a good dose of vanilla bean Ghee). In speaking of statistics, Missouri has 6.16 million residents; 4388 have tested positive. In my little “neck of the woods” there are about 7 confirmed (and sadly 1 death) out of approximately 56,000. I’ve been a bit more scared of how crazy the traffic has been when running errands. I’m not being lax in knowing that any of us can have this at any given time. But I’m growing more “restless” with the media coverage and what we, as a society, bite and digest in concerns to our own realities. My heart goes to the populated areas that have this spreading like fire. And I know those that are working tirelessly to fight it. I’m blessed beyond measure. And like you, I rely on the Big Empty and the peace I can find in solitude, enjoying nature, and writing. I am interested in the paper of the leper. Thank you for inspiring me (just in case I haven’t told you). 💚
❤ Just so you know, I LOVED being 50. It was a great moment in my life. I think it was the best (so far, as far as I can tell…) I'll start posting the leper paper this afternoon. You have made my day.
Thank you for writing this blog. I don’t always comment, but I always read!
I appreciate that! ❤
Your stats are much like ours: 301 cases diagnosed across the province; 187 have recovered; 4 deaths. Good fresh air maybe helps.
Like yourself, I thought of that old Ban commercial when I saw the prompt word today.
I wish I’d had a good story to go with the deodorant but none sprang to mind.
Same here. 🙂
I love those walks!
❤ Thank you. So do we. It's a balm for our souls. Not that the dogs need such things.
Maybe they do!
You know, they DO. If they don’t get out ever couple of days, they let me know their souls are in jeopardy. 🙂
What we tend to forget with “flattening the curve” is that when you make the curve flatter in the y-axis, you make it longer in the x-axis. So the plan is to make this pandemic last longer by making it less intense. Then we have people like our “total authority” leader, with the attention span of a five year old, wanting it to be done already. We can’t have it both ways. Flatter=longer.
I get that. Our dick wad president is now taking us out of WHO and lying through his stupid sphincter facial orifice. As I have learned that the only person in my control is me and I will live like this until there is a vaccine. But I have that luxury. The way I see it, a lot of dead people is at least as bad for the economy as what we’re doing now. Of course, I don’t KNOW that, but it seems that retired people on pensions are a main source of social stability at this point. I dunno…
Part of my mind says that this is just a way to reduce social security expenditures. 😦
That’s paranoid. 🙂
Just because you’re paranoid doesn’t mean they aren’t out to get you. ; )
I am still reading, even though I’ve been very quiet. It’s a companionable silence, if you get what I mean? Also, my concentration has been wrecked. It has been split a million ways.
Please publish your leprosy paper. I would like to read it.
I know you’re there. The leprosy paper will be up (part 1 is already) in four parts. It’s long and academic but it has pictures. 🙂
Reminds me how my husband was told by his science teacher that he should forget about chemistry and physics and concentrate instead on geology because geology had pretty pictures and involved colouring in. So, yay for pictures.
Definitely yay for pictures!
I feel a sort of guilt, living on the edge of the pandemic in my rural area that has been relatively untouched so far, similar to your Big Empty. Then I remind myself that most of my friends – from the Seattle area – thought I was nuts to move to such a quiet, slow, rural area. There are many trade-offs in life, and one never knows which will pan out because life is unpredictable. Right now, though, I’m happy I made the choices I did 15 years ago.
I had some similar thoughts today. ❤️
I am enjoying your blog more than is decent! I am a curious mouse – and bold because curiosity only kills cats! I can’t wait to read about Hanson’s Disease aka leprosy.
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