“Lamont, did you see they found fossils proving there were once whales with legs?”
“Dude, they have like five bones. You’re convinced with only five bones and a handful of teeth?”
“I think it’s more than that. They said he was ‘the God of death’.”
“I read that, too. I’ll give you the God of Death. It’s a microbe.”
“I think we can find the God of Death on all points of the God of Death spectrum, Lamont. You’re in a bad mood.”
“Not really. I’ve just lost my balance and fallen off my lofty perch of exalted philosophical equanimity.”
“I hate when that happens.”
“Yeah, no one likes it.”
“You want to go catch some waves?”
“Are you serious? The God of Death is out there using surfers as hors d’oeuvres.”
“They will, believe me, when they’ve chomped down on all the other beaches.”
“Lamont, I’m worried about you. You want to head inland and maybe head north? Go fishing in some crystalline stream?”
“Fish for salmon? No, I don’t think so. The God of Death might trundle by and fight me for his food. It’s HIS food after all. You might think being a bear is easy, but it isn’t. Just because a bear is big and fierce and a top predator, doesn’t mean a bear always gets what he wants.”
“Do you have to bring up THAT memory? I was just there, a beautiful day, spawning with the rest of them — my first spawn! — and suddenly I’m in a bear’s jaws like a pretzel at a poker game.”
“Good analogy. Life is a poker game.”
“Lamont, is there ANYTHING I can do to cheer you up?”
Lamont and Dude are characters I came up with a few years ago. They have the uncanny ability to remember many of their previous incarnations which gives them a unique perspective on life, the universe and everything.
11 thoughts on “Lamont and Dude Discuss Anubis”
Creative story for spout. Totally sounds like a conversation with my dinosaur crazy nephew.
Lamont and Dude were once velociraptors but the comet got them. 😀 I think by now there are about a million Lamont and Dude stories.
So up my nephew’s alley!
In this iteration, Lamont and Dude are humans living in a San Diego beach town.
I just read a book you might like, if you haven’t already read it. Yellowstone’s Ski Pioneers by Paul Schullery Fascinating. Less about skiing, ultimately, than about early efforts to control poaching and protect animals, but it was good.
Lamont sounds like he got up on the wrong side of the bed – or has been listening to talk radio! To think that he didn’t want to go surfing indicates a really dire mental situation! I hope Dude can snap him out of it…
Lamont’s just got weltscmerze… He’ll be OK.
Why is it always a crystalline stream?
Lamont and Dude deal in clichés
Comments are closed.