“What are you doing here?” “You forgot. I can fly.” “Lamont, seriously. What are you going to do while I’m working all day in a shipping container?” “What do I ever do? Observe the passing parade. That kind of thing.” “Wouldn’t you be happier back at the beach?” “I can go back any time. We … Continue reading Lamont and Dude Discuss Tar
“Humans.” “You’re a human, Lamont. You keep forgetting.” “I never forget. If I did, I’d end up at the museum in LA dressed in a Wooly Mammoth suit performing for kiddies.” “Ha ha. I’d take you down again, Lamont, and you know it. But what’s wrong with humans NOW???” “I was reading an article here … Continue reading Lamont and Dude Discuss Fire
“Hey Lamont! The Sand Snowman should be done today. They finished the Sand Christmas Tree yesterday.” “You don’t see anything strange about that? Consider how many people passing that creation have never seen a real snow man?” “Yeah, so what? Have you?” “I don’t know. I’ve been wondering about that, how many iterations I don’t … Continue reading Lamont and Dude Ponder Sand
“Where you going, Dude?” “Meeting up at the museum.” “OH! Does that mean your second iteration as a Smilodon — albeit this time only a costume — is about the recommence?” “Could be. I don’t know. I just hate that they have meetings on Saturdays. I don’t see why. The museum is busy as hell … Continue reading Lamont and Dude Discuss Human Limitations
“Lamont, should I get candy for the Trick-or-Treaters? “Huh?” “Hallowe’en.” “No. I mean why? Everything dies. It’s the least unique factor of life. Why are people afraid of the dead, anyway? Every time they dig up some old bones from, well, the very olden days everyone is very excited and it gets written up in … Continue reading Lamont and Dude Ponder Hallowe’en
“Lamont, did you see they found fossils proving there were once whales with legs?” “Never happened.” “Why not?” “Dude, they have like five bones. You’re convinced with only five bones and a handful of teeth?” “I think it’s more than that. They said he was ‘the God of death’.” “I read that, too. I’ll give … Continue reading Lamont and Dude Discuss Anubis
“How was it being back at work, Dude?” “Amazing how everyone and everything goes right back to where it was in that tide pool of prehistory.” “That’s pretty poetic for a Smilodon.” “No Smilodon, Lamont. Some programs are still suspended. It’s just me, a bunch of bones, a lot of dried tar, some solvent, some … Continue reading Lamont and Dude Ponder Disappointment
“Lamont, remember how we met?” “How could I ever forget that?” “Stop laughing.” “I’m sorry Dude, but it was pretty funny — or you were pretty funny — sitting up on that dune watching the ocean. I don’t even know if you surfed back in those days.” “Of course I surfed.” “Why are you asking, … Continue reading Lamont and Dude Discuss Communication
“I guess you’re what people would call eccentric, Lamont.” “Pot/kettle you weirdo.” “Seriously, Lamont. Even people on Twitter think your name is eccentric.” “It’s a great name. It means ‘the mountain’. I chose it because…” “That’s not the name your most recent human parents gave you?” “No. Of course not. Shudder.” “What’s your real name?” … Continue reading Lamont and Dude Ponder Human Names
“Dude! I thought you were surfing this morning.” “Sharks.” “Ah. Count your body parts just to be sure.” “Ha ha. You’re a laugh a minute. Really disappointing.” “Have some respect, Dude. They’ve been around 450 million years. They must have gotten something right.” “Well yeah. They live in the ocean and don’t overthink things. Those … Continue reading Lamont and Dude Ponder Sharks
“Summer is the season of inferior sledding” - Inuit proverb 
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